When You Think You’re Funny

I think I’m funny. Really funny. I know it’s not just in my head because it’s been confirmed by at least two people….my dad and my best friend. Those are two completely unbiased opinions that I can trust. I know there are others like me out there. Everyday comedians put on the planet to grace […]

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10 Stages of Runner’s Denial

Runner’s are an insane bunch. We trade pain, blisters, chaffing, shin splints, ugly feet, and a large chunk of our free-time for what? Pounding our feet into cement for hours until we can’t breathe anymore? I don’t know, man, but I love that shit. The other thing that runners consistently do is refuse to admit anything that […]

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When You Come From a Big Family

1. You need clarification “Have you talked to your brother lately?” “Which one?” 2. You never know what they’re up to “So how is your brother?” “Um, I think he lives in Colorado now?” 3. You have nightmares about the middle seat in the car Not only do I have a lot of siblings, but […]

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When you Have an Irregular Regular Nam​e

You respond to mispronunciations. If someone yells KIR-STIN, I’ll turn around. No, it’s definitely not how it’s pronounced but I get called that so often that the reaction is learned. Every important phone call starts with, “Could you spell that for me?” “That’s Kierstyn, K-I-E-R-S-T-Y-N, Robbins, with two B’s…….Yea, K-I-E-R-S-T-Y-N. Thanks.” Sometimes you’re not even sure […]

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How to Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day

Tell everyone this is the day of your people because you’re 1/16th Irish “My great, great, great grandmother’s best friend’s illegitimate love child was Irish.” Put green food dye in frickin’ everything Because who doesn’t want to dive into a plate of green spaghetti? Wear a douchy St. Patrick’s day themed shirt It definitely isn’t offensive […]

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